Weight Going Down Vs Up
It’s lame, but I feel so much better about myself when I know that I am losing weight. I remember that I once got to the point of being underweight and I hated the idea of eating food to gain weight.The idea was and still is very foreign to me. It makes me uncomfortable. I was at 112 lbs and if you look at the pictures of me back then - it does not look good. Even at that weight, I was still poking and prodding at things that I wanted to go away. I was still not satisfied with my body. Since I knew I was still losing weight, I felt okay though. But when I was told by my nutritionist that I needed to gain and she added all these foods into my diet, I hated it. I loved eating all the food, but it messed with my head. I saw myself as fat in the mirrors even more so and extra self-conscious in the mirror. I wish I could just be happy with my body,
January 28th, 2009 at 1:13 pm
How did you cope with eating more and gaining weight? I’m in a similar position as you were. I hate to admit it, but I enjoy eating. It’s just the weight gain that makes me feel terrible about myself. When I lose weight I feel proud and accomplished…even if it isn’t necessarily healthy.
February 1st, 2009 at 1:01 pm
How did I cope? I would like to say that I prayed and talked about it with others, but it’s not what I really did. I bottled up my thoughts and “took it like a man.” It was not a good way to go because I kept myself from expression my frustrations. I will say this. I have learned that G-d knows what is best. Having a higher power in general is so good. A higher power loves me when I am hating myself. And after all the weight gain was done, I now look back at those pictures of me in disgust. I did not look good. I did not see it then because I was obsessed with this idea in my head. Man, I really looked disgusting. I’m glad to be past that process even though it was mentally challenging. I sucked it up, enjoyed the delicious food, and got myself to better health.
July 17th, 2010 at 12:00 pm
Everybody loves links, especially Google.